The Modern Monastic’s Office

Optimum for contemplation, prayer and meditation in quiet

It is said by the Holy Spirit this year that the Internet and computers are the toys of Mammon. As such we should avoid them if we are pious observant followers of God. They corrupt the soul. We must lookout our window at the sun and the world of creation to observe the superior inventions and wonders by the creator god which are in comparison to the pale imitations of Mammon vastly superior and more compelling.

I must have some kind of office because even though I am a nun I write letters to others, I write entries for my blog since soapbox, and I also create books like the one I’m working on here. So here is my compromise in a nutshell:

I have a cheap canon pixma jotmatrix printer costing $40 from Walmart which contains a scanner and color ink hooked up to the cheapest refurbished HP laptop costing $109 also from Walmart. Basically, this is a secretary word processing setup suitable for any office. It is quite expensive, but as I have a hobby as a visual artist I need it to print my subjects to paint.

In addition, I have a cheap $20 DVD player which hooks up to my 18-year-old flat screen visio television. With this I can watch documentaries and enlarge my mind. The television is for news and weather. Occasionally on the weekends especially Saturdays I will allow myself some entertainment on PBS with the good wholesome British documentaries. Holiday specials on all the networks are wonderful and perfectly permittable.

I no longer shop on the Internet if I can help because there are too many crafty crooks. I hesitate at online banking because a spy in my building monitors my every move. WELL,I HAVE BEEN TOLD BY A RUSSIAN FRIEND, A RETIRED OPERATIVE NEIGHBOR HERE, THAT THE ZANY CAMERA SPY WAS THE DECEASED JIMMY CARTER, OUR RECENTLY DECEASED PRESIDENT.  AS A BAPTIST MINISTER, I SUPPOSE HE FELT IT HIS DUTY TO KEEP AN EYE ON ME AS A FAVOR TO EVE, MY AUNT IN GEORGIA.

 Yes, I mostly keep track of 4 mailboxes in three different vendors: Gmail Google Outlook Microsoft and Proton Freebie. To avoid censorship from Bill Gates and friend’s proton allows me international contacts for free and a lot of premium features. Because I have a talk therapy business starting up, I have a mailbox on proton for that called session sister and on WordPress I have a special mailbox for future clients which costs me $25 a year. Of course, there is the blog common said soapbox which allows me to present my thoughts and directives as a modern Catholic done living in America.

So, there is no buzzing cable service in my home. Additionally, I do not[MG1]  have a phone because they are just too exorbitant at present and technologies faulty. In the future I may borrow a friend’s phone to dial 911 an emergency. Because I have hearing loss as an elderly person, I am hoping to invest in a capital phone at home which has a visual screen and is a landline phone instead. Who cost me$75 to start up and is free.

My landlord provides 2 computers in the lobby for tenant use that are free. I check my emails there. Privacy per se is nil. Perhaps it is good for a monastic to have no privacy and live out in the public as if her home is a bus stop. Saint Teresa of India lived like that.

This turns out to be because I have a privileged relationship with the son of the owner of the property here. There is no profit from the relationship, but he is a bit fraternal and one of the things he does is use a key to come in and explore my room and see what I’m up to. He is a Moslem in Germany other countries and quite wealthy I hear. Additionally, a very strange scientist has a cable camera in parts of my building. I will not comment about his unlawful behavior except to say that it is a felony granting 10 years in prison to do so.

I believe that there are one or two mystical clairvoyance in the building or Hellcats who have the power at will to look inside a person’s apartment with their heads. I will not comment on this at the present time. I am seeking to move into a local church as a resident or a new home like a house.

In summary the arrangement I have described provides me with the cheapest quietest and most conducive to prayer and reflection living room you could ever hope for. Recommend it to all modern monastics of any denomination.

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 [MG1]It is confidential to say that the carters ran a nursing home in a wing of this apartment complex for over twenty years. There is a Carter doll in the region who looks like an oriental physicist from OSHER.